• Tangled Slinky
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    1267 months ago

    This has big “FW: FW: RE: FW:” energy.

    • @PumaStoleMyBluff@lemmy.world
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      77 months ago

      Going to forward it to my dad so he can slowly read it aloud during Thanksgiving dinner while a dozen people sit uncomfortably in silence, waiting for him to look up so they can awkwardly laugh.

    • @SheDiceToday@eslemmy.es
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      27 months ago

      Because it is, just translated to picture memes now instead of formatted to have big, flashing red-lettered words and bolded emphasis. I remember seeing this list at least a few years ago.

  • @Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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    707 months ago

    Someone took a list of insults written about soldiers in the military, and rephrased them. Do you actually think teachers would say this stuff about their students in writing?

    This website just doesn’t get satire.

  • Beefalo
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    337 months ago

    “When her IQ reaches 50 she should sell” is probably the wittiest one.

    I’m going to assume that none of these teachers are real, some corndog just pulled this thing out of the fucked up meme engine that makes facebook suck so bad. Some schmuck who writes jokes for morning FM drive time radio probably sat down with a pencil and wrote these.

    If it gets any worse it’s going to say “REAL FRIENDS STAY” in shitty cursive on a purple background and that’s it, that’s the whole meme, because facebook.

    I wonder how close to the bottom of that drain we are now.

  • @clockwork_octopus@lemmy.world
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    267 months ago

    My favorite is the “delusions of adequacy”, that one had to sting! The six-pack one though sounds like possible ADHD or some other learning disorder - your child is smart enough, but lacks the ability to do well

  • @Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    I hope the teacher who said #11 isn’t teaching reproductive biology.

    The sperm that makes it through to the egg doesn’t get there first. Multitudes of other sperms die weakening the wall, receiving nothing in return, only for another to slide right in and reap all the rewards and renown for their sacrifice. It’s basically the perfect analogy for capitalism.

  • @HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml
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    7 months ago

    Poor kid is probably neurodivergent and being told to “just stop it” or “just be normal” instead of actually receiving the help they need.

    • @intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      167 months ago

      Unhelpful advice I’ve received from neurotypicals who have, apparently, no theory of mind:

      • Just think about it
      • You should try making a to-do list
      • You’re just embarrassing yourself when you act that way
      • Oh but it’s not a big deal, see?
      • Calm down
      • Iron Lynx
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        37 months ago

        I once in high school was told about a thing I couldn’t do to basically “just do it” by a teacher. In a meeting about my support network. My mother almost wanted to hit the teacher in the head with the dossier.

    • @kraftpudding@lemmy.world
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      97 months ago

      Maybe some of them, but some people are just legitimately stupid beyond repair in a neurotypical way. It’s not their fault, it’s not a moral failing and they deserve empathy and respect. It’s just very unfortunate in today’s society.

    • unhappy_grapefruit 2
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      7 months ago

      It’s called satire. Although you don’t seem like the type of individual to pick up on that edit dam does this come off really passive aggressively

      • @HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml
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        7 months ago

        You know you can also analyze satire and comment on the hypothetical people involved in them too, right? Because satire is supposed to be a way to draw attention to real-life problems?

        • unhappy_grapefruit 2
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          7 months ago

          I don’t think there are many hypothetical teachers going around and commenting on there students like this. They sure as hell won’t have there jobs for long

          • @HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml
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            7 months ago

            And yet we absolutely do have a problem of very neurodivergent kids simply being called “stupid” and “a brat” by their teachers and being told to “stop it” and “just be normal” instead of, you know, the trained professional in child education recognizing those symptoms and referring parents to various resources for their child.

            See? Satire. You exaggerate and make comical a real world problem in an attempt to get people to recognize that while it may not be as extreme as in the fictional piece, it definitely is a problem that is happening.

  • credit crazy
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    137 months ago

    Number 5 is probably my favorite mostly because I like talking hyperboles and taking them even further

    • Jo Miran
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      47 months ago

      Bold of you to assume the teacher has a basic understanding of any subject matter they teach. We need to stop assuming we’re going to get the cream of the crop when teachers are often forced to take second jobs just to make ends meet. If we pay more, then we can demand more, and someday we can expect more.