Also, the Jewish God and Muslim Allah are on the International Space Station.
This is a parody account, right? Right?
It must be there’s no way this is real.
Oh dip, nice username
Thank you!
i feel like hes almost too articulate even in his typos for this to be non parody. this sounds like a non stupid guy making a joke for religious idiots to fall for.
I used to be sure of these things in the past, but now I ain’t so sure anymore…
God: All knowing and all powerful But wait, satellites, oh no!
Bulletproof logic
“Satellites block God’s ability to watch us”
The omniscient, omnipotent god is defeated by a piece of space trash? What a rip-off.
Same God that ‘decided’ a year shouldn’t land on a whole day. Threw in that .25 for shits and giggles.
actually… .256363004 days or 6 h 9 min 9.76 s
Such intelligent design.
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If you accept the Biblical proof of God you do also have to accept that he’s a huge asshole.
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Why does God need a LOS?
National Association of Satan’s Atheists, or NASA.
I’m proud to be one of Satan’s Atheists, but we’re actually international now. We’ve got a chapter in Manchester.
Yes that’s the INASA.
Funny how this is a Twitter post as half of all satellites orbiting earth (5581 out of 11300) are owned by Musk.
No, you’re mistaken. Lonnie is on the Right, which means his satellites reflect and amplify prayers. Or at least get a pass. He hates LGBTQ people, so he’s “good.” /s
No need for /s because that’s exactly how it works.
“If you hate the right people and say the right things, you are Good People, and Good People can’t do no wrong. If you’re not one of the Good People, you can do no right. Laws and rationalizations are there to punish those that are not Good People.”
Isn’t God supposed to be all-powerful and omnipotent?
That should tell you just how serious this issue with satellites is…
yes but he doesn’t want to interfere with our precious free will, starvation and rape be damned
we just have to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps
This is either (1) satire, (2) trolling, or (3) someone who has no real grasp of Christianity. Or some combination of the above.
(4) Protestants doing an unholy amalgamation of Catholic spirituality and Rational Scientific Inquiry to reach absurdist conclusions at their intersection.
(5) Cheap propaganda to further destabilize American institutions and hegemony
If this works then whomever is being convinced, should be convinced, as it clarifies where the idiocy-non-idiocy line is.
Nar man. It isn’t all about idiocy. Not everyone has your level of education; and even aside from that, people tend to grab bits and pieces of ideas that support what they already believe.
So if someone believes in god and the power of pray etc. but they feel that life still isn’t going there way - they might see some value in this ‘reason’. And even if this evil satellite thing is still implausible, a person might take bits of the idea to make their own version about something / someone else blocking prays. It could be 4G radiation, or vaccine microchips, or some other boogieman crap. It all feeds into a persons broader ‘understanding’ of how things could be even if they don’t take in the whole idea.
You and I are basically immune to this particular post. It just looks like total garbage immediately. But it is incorrect and dangerous to think that only ‘idiots’ can be conned or tricked. All it takes is for someone to post ideas on the boundaries of what you understand, with a taste of what you want to hear. That’s what hooks people in. For smart and educated people, that boundary of understanding can be pretty far in - but it still exists, and that’s where the manipulation can still get them.
Yeah, I hear you, but this is a person that is unconscious, I mean if they’re using the internet to post stuff, have they even thought or tried to understand one iota of what the hell is going on?
I’ve met some smart people that make these reasoning errors because they want to believe that phenomena just cannot be complex. Not even I’m excluded from these errors, I’m also just human.
I can sympathize with uneducated people and them grasping for fictitious enemies because they lack control of and in their own lives.
What makes things even worse is that this is supposed a pastor, and he’s using his authority to spread this bullcrap.
I’m not immune to this type of misinformed and irrational thinking, but I think my confusion results from more sophisticated material in many cases, that being said I still hold irrational ideas around conspiracies, but I don’t hold them as gospel, merely as possibiliry.
Unfortunately even us educated people might not be spared when generative AI begins to rewrite our history in each of our 5 senses and leaves us no way to look back in time to find the ground truth.
(7) The war on xmas!
My take is that this qualifies as having no real grasp of Christianity. But I wouldn’t argue hard against this being a separate option
(3) …Christianity or basic foundational education…
Exactly. Everyone knows that Jesus navigates based his position relative to the the absolute position of celestial bodies. That and there is no way that a simple, unarmored satelite would make it past his point-defense batteries and compromise his re-entry trajectory.
If there’s something the internet has confirmed since its’ inception, is that humanity is both incredibly clever and incredibly stupid, in equal measure, beyond what I ever imagined was possible, beyond what I could conceive.
It’s clearly a joke. But it’s not that much more ridiculous than what many Christians actually believe. That’s the joke.
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Evel
All prayers are being converted to “bring back Evel Knievel.” We really want him back.
Satan wins again. At this point the Christians have to admit they chose the losing side.
I mean this God of theirs is shit, can’t even get around satellites, didn’t think humans might beat their cocks raw despite seeing it constantly in Human 1.0 (Chimps), or that they might eat fish on a Tuesday or whatever. Even Jesus was fucking a whore and he was God incarnate.
Also God invented Cancer.
Jesus fucking a prostitute. I’m interested. Never read the bible so I don’t know about it, but I’m curious.
All those prayers from soccer fans for their team to win the World Cup were being intercepted all along 😥
That explains all the USA and Russian World Cup championships won. Too much technology 😧
It’s a good job they haven’t heard of ceilings yet. 😅
I did the research. It is satire. They wished everyone a Merry Eaglemas this week.
This is a funny one.
The Jews TM are using iron dome to shoot down christian prayers before they reach heaven.
Let’s detonate the moon since it’s the biggest satellite
C’mon, the picture is clearly ironic
Don’t be so serious about it
Any sufficiently advanced satire of fundamentalism is indistinguishable from sincere fundamentalism.
Poe’s Law is in full effect here.
