Just buy reusable mesh bags and stop wasting plastic to protect your produce for a 20 minute car ride.
There’s no way I’m getting to my car when opening a bag is this hard
“Joke about the inability to open a car because the inability to open a little bag”
;-)
The joke is the same as in the picture. As in: since I’m having so much trouble opening this bag I will never get to my car because I’ll be stuck here trying to open this bag. Hope that helps!
“just put the fruit in the cart” gang represent
Right? Just gonna wash it anyway
Just dump all the loose blueberries into it.
I put them in my pockets and hope I don’t bump into anyone.
You’re a savage, go back to the forest.
Not all of those bags are the same.
The produce bag rolls at most stores around me are compostable now. They are also breathable and will keep the produce fresh longer when left in the bag.
The “waste” is negligible; doing some napkin math, a 20 minute car ride accounts for 300 times higher carbon footprint than a plastic produce bag (can elaborate if you want). A reused mesh bag is going to be less hygienic and less convenient, and factoring in the higher footprint of production and distribution (produce bags come in packs of thousands) you would need to get a lot of reuse out of it to even be worth it. Considering impact of disposal, as long as you live somewhere that has sane waste disposal and doesn’t empty their trash into the ocean it’s not going to be significant either.
It’s less about the carbon and more about the fact that it doesn’t degrade. It’s plastic pollution.
everything that helps helps
Best part is I can carry 2-3 fully loaded reusable bags vs 12 flimsy plastic ones that split and overflow.
in sweden we have paper bags that are then used for food waste recycling at home.
Produce Manager here. Place the end that opens directly between your two palms, and rub your palms together vigorously. The bag will stick to one palm or both, opening every time. Please stop licking your fingers to open these bags and then picking through our vegetables. You’re gross.
Vegetable Farmer here. That shit is already gross. Wash your veggies.
Produce Manager here. Thanks for all of the gross vegetables!
Consumer of vegetables here. Where can I find the yams?
Yam section. Can’t miss it.
I knew there will be a comment like this.
A breath of hot air also makes the bag stick to your hands and easy to separate. Like you’re trying to fog a window.
simply use the moisture from the sprayers
I’ve touched sprayed produce before just for the grip. 🥴
The what now? I haven’t seen those since the early '90s.
They’re still in use everywhere I’ve shopped
At least the bags say “OPEN HERE”. We’d be fucked if they said “OPEN IN ZIMBABWE” or something like that.
Not sure, I might have just figured out Steven Wright’s Lemmy account.
Excuse me? That was a George Carlin joke I stole.
As a person with eternally sweaty palms, this right here is my superpower. (⌐■-■)
If you listen closely you can hear him whisper words of wisdom such as: “I’ve tried both ends five times now!”, “I think this one must be defective!”, or my personal favorite “I don’t think these are the same brand they had out last week!”
Sounds like me plugging in a USB stick.
USB plugs are actually a great at-home demonstration of quantum mechanics. The USB plug exists in a quantum superposition of alignment - being simultaneously correctly aligned and not aligned until being inserted. Once insertion is attempted, the wave function collapses to a random alignment.
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My hands are too dry for this to be effective
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You must be shrooming. There’s a reason people moisten their fingers when working with stuff like this.
I can hear your username. Well done.
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I would encourage you to read and understand things before behaving like an unpleasant and haughty know-it-all
You didn’t even click my link because if you read it, then you’d have to admit that you’ve been embarrassingly wrong this entire time, starting with that eye-rolling emoji. That’s really hard for you, isn’t it – to admit that you’re wrong.
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I touch the moist sprayers to wet my fingers enough and the opening of the bag is always the part that’s already detached.
Those two tips help.
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You’d think that!
I go to the broccolis and touch the usually wet crate first.
Crumple it into a ball and straighten it again. Then put it between your flat hands and rub them against each other.
The small wrinkles from crumpling break cohesion between the layers, and the friction from rubbing separates them.Burn the witch!
I have dry hands, these are my nemesis
I heavily heavily sympathetize. I can’t get the damn things open. I bought the reusable mesh bags because it is far less frustrating to use. Except when I forget to bring them…
I just wave it around frantically until the wind opens it.
Breath on your fingers like you’re trying to fog up glass. Immediately open by running your fingers in opposite directions along the edge, using the additional friction you created.
Instructions unclear, bag is stuck in my glasses
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Please don’t breathe your germs onto my vegetables
Keep my vegetables out your fucking mouth.
Just lick your fingers first! The grocery store sells food products, it and its patrons have to be hygienic …
/s
Put the opening “line” between your big hands and rub it; both hands goes along the “opening line”, one hand moves one way, the other hand the other way for say some centimetres or an inch or two, change direction, repeat.
Sometimes works, sometimes I’m rubbing away like a boy scout trying to get his fire starter merit badge
I just tap the tips of my finger and thumb to my tongue for a bit of moisture and then they open right up.
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Or just ask anybody to lick your fingers.
This is what I always did before covid but now I don’t anymore.
Me too! Back when we thought COVID could spread easily from surface contact, I found myself at the grocery trying to decide WTF I was going to do.
“Uh, dare I stick my fingers under the mask, or, what?”
But at that point I’ve already wandered the whole store and have touched any number of things that could have been manhandled by all the other finger-licking, unmasked hand-sneezing, butt-scratching, non-hand-washing straw men in the grocery store. One of those dudes is a septic tank cleaner, and he doesn’t wear gloves because he says he’s allergic! And soap burns when it gets into all the oozing sores on his hands.
There’s no way I’m licking my fingers until I’ve washed them or at least forgotten about my pus-leaking, poop-handed caricature!
Do you really think that way or are you just making a joke? Seems we humans went from making fun of Semmelweis to absolute germaphobes. Does no one get biology education anymore? Or is it more a failure to examine risk realistically? Freaks me out how fearful people are now days.
Always washed my hands regularly. Even as a toddler, I remember getting sticky ice cream on my hands and hating it. But I’m not manic about it, don’t give a shit worrying about bacteria/viruses/fungi/prions/whatever. (Unless I’ve been into something obviously rotten. Ask me about the fungus I found at camp today. Not touching that with a 10’ frog.)
Only time I really think about what I’m doing is after shooting or gunsmithing. Lots of nasty shit, above and beyond lead, you don’t want to ingest. Because heavy metals are for life. Bacteria? I’ll quote the retards from the pandemic, “i HaVe aN IMMunE sYsteM!”
LOVE your writing BTW! I should trawl your comments. (NM, just did. You’re smart and express yourself perfectly. We should be friends. Your damned skin cancer post got me thinking about the tiny spot under my pec. Not sure it’s healing, but at least it’s smaller and not blackish any longer.)
I am, in the parlance of our time, a silly goose. Sometimes I just like to take the opportunity to throw words together in novel ways.
It is true that the finger lick thing is not my preferred approach, but my actual reasoning is boring - I don’t like physical sensation of licking my fingers.
