Yeah I stumbled across him on Facebook in 2021. He took a lot of those posts down, the ones that said he’d divorce her id she got the vaccine, but I saw them all.
Sure, but that kind of thing mostly refers to housing and income. It would be trivial to get vaccinated without telling your spouse or anyone else who wants to make a big deal out of it. This lady made the bet that appeasing her husband was more important than getting vaccinated and she lost that bet. Her husband certainly bears a large portion of the blame for creating the situation she found herself in but she could have easily found her way out of it without causing a fuss. She chose not to.
I don’t think you’ve been in a relationship like what I’m talking about, and I’m glad for you. Emotional abuse is terrifying. I live it and it’s absolutely killing me and because of money I can do nothing different.
I’m sure it is a very unpleasant situation to be in. That doesn’t change the fact that getting vaccinated is simple, cheap, and as anonymous as you would like it to be.
You can call it whatever you like but it won’t make what I’m saying any less true. Getting vaccinated is intentionally easy to do. Laws prohibit doctors and any organization with access from sharing medical records. A shitty spouse has less control over this choice than the vast majority of choices in your life.
I’m sending the message to anyone reading this that it is possible to get vaccinated even if there are people in your life who don’t want you to do that. What are you doing besides telling people it’s important to get vaccinated unless it’s a bit more difficult than it should be? Who does that help? Everyone already knows that abusive spouses are dicks. That fact doesn’t need any more attention.
It’s not a universal truth that you can just choose to get a vaccination without making an appointment or needing to involve insurance etc.
In a hypothetical extreme scenario, imagine having to weigh the risks between getting the vaccine that will potentially save your life and unexpectedly getting an appointment reminder text/email or follow-up contact that alerts the controlling partner and they potentially end your life for the “transgression.”
The vaccine being “cheap” is also not universal and if you aren’t allowed personal discretionary spending anything >$0 isn’t cheap enough.
Yes, you’ve successfully summarized the situation this woman may have faced. She chose to let the fear of her spouse make her decision for her. Did she make the right decision? I don’t think so. She’s still dead. At least if she was murdered for choosing to get vaccinated it could be said that she did everything she could to keep herself alive. Maybe that’s a meaningless distinction and maybe it isn’t. I think that comes down to the way you view personal responsibility. Still, whether coerced or not her decision lead to her death and that’s worth pointing out no matter how unfortunate you find the circumstances that lead up to it.
You are of course free to disagree with that assessment but I am firmly of the belief that getting vaccinated is always better than not getting vaccinated unless you have a valid medical reason to avoid vaccination.
I hate hearing that you’re in this situation. I know there are a lot of things that make it hard to escape but I hope one day you’re able to. I don’t know if you’re in the US but just in case: thehotline.org leads to the national domestic violence hotline’s website, which has an easy X button to press if you have to close it quickly. The website says they can help in cases of emotional abuse and when people are stuck due to finances.
Not matter how insurmountable it may seem, I suggest you take a few minutes, each day, week, month to plan an escape in secret. Find allies outside of the relationship. Leave nothing behind you cannot replace, especially child and animals.
Make multiple escape plans, no matter how unlikely they seem.
The more the better so when an opportunity presents itself you are already read and just go. The element of surprise is critical.
You can coax even a grown-ass person to not take the vaccine via misinformation and guilt tripping. Covid is only like 4 years ago it should be still fresh in everyone’s mind.
How did he force her to not get vaccinated? She’s a grown ass woman
By bombarding her with antivaxxer propaganda and threatening her with divorce if she got it sadly.
Grown or not, some people are very much under their spouse’s control because of money and other vulnerability.
Are you for real “for real”? This is OC and you know the backstory?
Yeah I stumbled across him on Facebook in 2021. He took a lot of those posts down, the ones that said he’d divorce her id she got the vaccine, but I saw them all.
Sure, but that kind of thing mostly refers to housing and income. It would be trivial to get vaccinated without telling your spouse or anyone else who wants to make a big deal out of it. This lady made the bet that appeasing her husband was more important than getting vaccinated and she lost that bet. Her husband certainly bears a large portion of the blame for creating the situation she found herself in but she could have easily found her way out of it without causing a fuss. She chose not to.
I don’t think you’ve been in a relationship like what I’m talking about, and I’m glad for you. Emotional abuse is terrifying. I live it and it’s absolutely killing me and because of money I can do nothing different.
I’m sure it is a very unpleasant situation to be in. That doesn’t change the fact that getting vaccinated is simple, cheap, and as anonymous as you would like it to be.
Is it? Did she have her own transportation? Was she able to leave the house without her husband’s knowledge, or without him keeping tabs on her?
What you’re doing is victim blaming at its finest. Just stop.
You can call it whatever you like but it won’t make what I’m saying any less true. Getting vaccinated is intentionally easy to do. Laws prohibit doctors and any organization with access from sharing medical records. A shitty spouse has less control over this choice than the vast majority of choices in your life.
I’m sending the message to anyone reading this that it is possible to get vaccinated even if there are people in your life who don’t want you to do that. What are you doing besides telling people it’s important to get vaccinated unless it’s a bit more difficult than it should be? Who does that help? Everyone already knows that abusive spouses are dicks. That fact doesn’t need any more attention.
It’s not a universal truth that you can just choose to get a vaccination without making an appointment or needing to involve insurance etc.
In a hypothetical extreme scenario, imagine having to weigh the risks between getting the vaccine that will potentially save your life and unexpectedly getting an appointment reminder text/email or follow-up contact that alerts the controlling partner and they potentially end your life for the “transgression.”
The vaccine being “cheap” is also not universal and if you aren’t allowed personal discretionary spending anything >$0 isn’t cheap enough.
Yes, you’ve successfully summarized the situation this woman may have faced. She chose to let the fear of her spouse make her decision for her. Did she make the right decision? I don’t think so. She’s still dead. At least if she was murdered for choosing to get vaccinated it could be said that she did everything she could to keep herself alive. Maybe that’s a meaningless distinction and maybe it isn’t. I think that comes down to the way you view personal responsibility. Still, whether coerced or not her decision lead to her death and that’s worth pointing out no matter how unfortunate you find the circumstances that lead up to it.
You are of course free to disagree with that assessment but I am firmly of the belief that getting vaccinated is always better than not getting vaccinated unless you have a valid medical reason to avoid vaccination.
I hate hearing that you’re in this situation. I know there are a lot of things that make it hard to escape but I hope one day you’re able to. I don’t know if you’re in the US but just in case: thehotline.org leads to the national domestic violence hotline’s website, which has an easy X button to press if you have to close it quickly. The website says they can help in cases of emotional abuse and when people are stuck due to finances.
I really wish you the best OP <3
Thank you. Unfortunately I am not and I’d never leave my dogs behind, but some days are really awful.
Not matter how insurmountable it may seem, I suggest you take a few minutes, each day, week, month to plan an escape in secret. Find allies outside of the relationship. Leave nothing behind you cannot replace, especially child and animals.
Make multiple escape plans, no matter how unlikely they seem.
The more the better so when an opportunity presents itself you are already read and just go. The element of surprise is critical.
Ok, I get what you’re saying, but she could have just gotten vaccinated without him knowing.
Yeah, I know, easy for me to say. But at some point, you need to take agency over your own decisions.
There’s people who can’t leave the house without their spouse tailing along.
You can coax even a grown-ass person to not take the vaccine via misinformation and guilt tripping. Covid is only like 4 years ago it should be still fresh in everyone’s mind.
Ah yes, conservative women. Known for their full autonomy and independent thinking