• bubbalu [they/them]@hexbear.net
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    9 months ago

    Have an insanely skilled marksman as a manchurian candidate simultaneously goad 80 senators into challenging him. Mow them down and declare a worker’s republic. This is how the Comintern planned to enact the Black Belt Thesis.

    • WayeeCool [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      9 months ago

      That Prius driver in Florida that went John Wick on a Republican politician that decided to shoot at him during a road rage incident? DNC should hire him and create a drill team of professional duelists on retainer.

          • the_itsb [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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            9 months ago

            Thank you!!

            Edit:

            After Kuczwanski’s BMW drifted out of its lane while heading north on Thomasville Road, it hit a white Prius, sparking a clash between the two drivers. The cars then pulled up into a parking lot and the other driver confronted Kuczwanski about hitting his car.

            The other driver eventually went back inside his car to wait for law enforcement officers but Kuczwanski is believed to have then rammed his BMW into the driver’s door. He also allegedly pushed the car sideways in the parking lot.

            After hitting the white Prius with the driver inside, Kuczwanski shot at the car, the report said. The other driver also brought out a gun and fired back into the BMW’s windshield, hitting Kuczwanski.

            Jfc! Real “fuck around, find out” hours

            However, his wife Rebekah Kuczwanski said that he was “trying to get away from a man shooting at him”.

            “You’d try to escape too! He was trapped and assassinated!” she wrote on Twitter.

            She added: “Our whole lives are shattered. The children and I, his friends and family, so many who adored this wonderful, kind, loving man who would do anything for anyone. We are all devastated. The whole world lost a great man!”

            Lmao

            I feel a little bad for her - her psycho husband had previously been in trouble with the law for road rage, being in a car while the driver is losing their shit is fucking terrifying, and witnessing your spouse’s mortal injury would be horrific - but that’s some hilarious rewriting of history right there.

            “Assassinated” 😂😂😂

            • LeZero [he/him]@hexbear.net
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              9 months ago

              You can’t FAFO around the Liberal Driller (this story has been living in my head rent free since I heard the Chapos riffing on it)

  • GinAndJuche@hexbear.net
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    9 months ago

    Dueling is a net gain for every society that allows it. It removes half of the people chuddy enough to duel

    • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      9 months ago

      Is this a joke? Dueling is the complete repudiation of justice. Instead of right or wrong being determined in a courtroom, are you seriously proposing that right or wrong be determined by whoever has better hand-eye coordination? Advocating for dueling as a mechanism to resolve disputes is actually ableist. Are disabled people simply supposed to lose every single conflict?

      It removes half of the people chuddy enough to duel

      Apologies for my crude language, but this makes zero fucking sense. When you challenge someone to a duel, you are not politely asking them for a duel, you are slapping them in the fucking face. Yes, hold on, let me just allow this jackass to slap me in the fucking face and bully me around.

      When you reject a duel, you lose face. This is how dueling works. Dueling is not a matter of being “chuddy enough to duel”, dueling is a matter of protecting your dignity.

      We already have a mechanism for determining who is right or wrong in a dispute. They’re called courts, and even though they aren’t perfect, they are infinitely better at providing justice than the complete repudiation of justice that dueling is.

      Dueling should stay illegal.

      • casskaydee [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        9 months ago

        Is this a joke?

        Pretty obviously, yes

        [four paragraph effortpost]

        This can also be answered by the answer to your first question.

        A neo-Nazi slaps an antifascist activist in the face and challenges him to a duel. Would it be “chuddy” for the activist to accept?

        It would be pretty stupid, so I guess, yeah?

        • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          9 months ago

          It would be pretty stupid, so I guess, yeah?

          “Chuddy” is not a synonym for stupid. An offended parent challenges a schoolteacher to a duel by insulting him and slapping him in the face, because the schoolteacher gave his kid a bad mark. In a fit of rage, the schoolteacher accepts the duel, loses the duel, and dies. The offended parent is not arrested, because it was a duel, and winning a duel is not murder. Was the schoolteacher “chuddy”?

          • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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            9 months ago

            Consider the alternative where the school teacher doesn’t accept and nothing happens to them. That fit of rage is doing a lot of lifting. “Get away from me, maniac” should be all you need for face and dignity. I don’t know where this idea that slapping someone being permissable because they say the magic words of offering a duel comes from.

            • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
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              9 months ago

              I don’t know where this idea that slapping someone being permissable because they say the magic words of offering a duel comes from.

              I agree that it’s absolutely ridiculous in a modern context where dueling has died as an institution, but historically for one to refuse a duel from a person of equal or greater social standing than them would ruin one’s reputation.

      • CTHlurker [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        9 months ago

        This bill is solely about dueling in the Missouri State Senate, and is only backed by Republicans. If Republicans in Missouri want to shoot each other, I wholeheartedly encourage them to do so. Dueling in this case is not about “justice” or “right/wrong” but about the subhuman pondscum that becomes Republican state senators being too fucking angry to do useful politics and instead resort to slapfights against each other.

      • BountifulEggnog [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        9 months ago

        When you challenge someone to a duel, you are not politely asking them for a duel, you are slapping them in the fucking face. Yes, hold on, let me just allow this jackass to slap me in the fucking face and bully me around.

        When you reject a duel, you lose face. This is how dueling works. Dueling is not a matter of being “chuddy enough to duel”, dueling is a matter of protecting your dignity.

        Being willing to kill someone because they disrespected you, to save face, or protect your dignity seems very chuddy to me.

      • Dueling for senators

        Its dueling for them… it’s not mandatory for prisoners and school teachers to do shit like that

        Let these politicians go… let them tarry… let them sink or let them swim, they don’t give a damn for us so why should we for them?

      • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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        9 months ago

        We already have a mechanism for determining who is right or wrong in a dispute. They’re called courts

        Courts are for whether what they did was illegal. Your partner doesn’t have to break the law to be worthy of divorce. I think you are off base in the assertion this has anything to do with justice. Contract disputes don’t need duels, traffic violations don’t need duels, victims of violence and robbery don’t need duels. Imagine if you cheated in a duel and the plaintiff had to duel you because of it.

        Dueling is a stupid game for stupid prizes. If you duel over an attractive person or because the moderate wing of fascism is annoying then your play for dignity is the subject of my ridicule. Dueling for disputes about the color of cages in amerikkka is funny. The congress of a fascist state catabolizing itself is good actually.

        • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          9 months ago

          Dueling is a stupid game for stupid prizes. If you duel over an attractive person or because the moderate wing of fascism is annoying then your play for dignity is the subject of my ridicule.

          It’s my opinion that people should not be allowed to play stupid games where the only rewards are stupid prizes. The winner of the duel should go to jail, and the loser of the duel should go to jail, after going to the hospital.

          I agree with you on your other points.

          • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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            9 months ago

            I would argue that the prohibition of vices is ineffective. There are plenty of drugs without upside including alcohol. No history of prohibition was ever anything but a giant waste of money that created organized crime. Gambling is so simple that you’d get casinos popping up everywhere. There’s also a secret, sinister third one about sex.

            Would society be better off without it? Sure. Would the prevalence increase with legality? Sure (maybe because I think it was just for senators or something?). Would I be torn up if Missouri decided it was a dumb idea? No. My point? It would be funny if it happened - doubly so if it was just for congresspeople.

            • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
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              9 months ago

              I would argue that the prohibition of dueling has been highly effectively, given how the practice is virtually extinct today.

              The prohibition of dueling in particular is highly effective because dueling is no longer seen as an aristocratic practice but rather as a barbarity of the past. Today, nobody gains any honor from winning a duel. When William Burr shot and killed Alexander Hamilton in their duel 200 years ago, it ended his political career, because by then dueling had already lost its prestige.

  • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    9 months ago

    Tangentially, I really wanted the Zucc/Musk fight to happen. I also wanted the battle of the sons debate. If you’re going to get impunity in your reign of terror, being a spectacle of ridicule is a good trade.

  • DragonBallZinn [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    9 months ago

    No really, let this happen. Bring back dueling as long as both parties consent. Only macho idiots would agree to duel and they’ll do the job of bashing the fash for us.