Recently I have been struggling a little trying to accept and prepare for the consequences of coming out and exposing this very sensitive part of myself to the world. With the increase in hate crimes and anti-trans sentiment it is a very scary idea.
This was made even worse by a comment I found on Reddit today:
People ask why I bailed on transitioning. It’s not fun having your entire right to exist as a human being used as a political tool. It’s exhausting. I don’t want to have to spend my life justifying who I am to people who frankly don’t give a shit either way. They just want to hate me. 15 years ago nobody gave a toss which toilet I used in public. Today I’ll get spat on while waiting for a bus because I dared wear a dress. Not once in my life in this country till about 5 or 6 year ago did I ever feel scared for my safety for being who I am. I may be miserable now, but at least nobody is spitting on me anymore.
So I’d love to hear other’s perspectives on what they’ve actually experienced and how they have dealt with it. I am sorry for raising such a painful topic but hopefully it can help people.
Nobody can hurt me more than I can. Choosing to suffer so they don’t hurt me isn’t living. I accepted violence may Befall me and that it may cost me my life to transition before I started. It was part of the wisdom of the time back then
So yeah they can spit on me. Maybe they’ll even try to kill me. But I’m not the one hurting me so long as I’m transitioning, they carry the weight of their actions. I will force them to hurt me themselves. And I will be a person who forces your soul to ache when you hurt her. And throughout all this I still meet bigots. But I have spit to spare too.