I’ll get the ball rolling:

Dead Man’s Shoe (2004)

Sounds like a tearjerking tale of a recently-bereaved man returning the shoe of a road accident victim he found in a bush to the victim’s late wife, through which they spark a deep friendship that goes beyond mere love. PG-13 5/10 Oscar-bait shite.

  • FullOfBallooons@leminal.spaceEnglish
    501·
    1 year ago

    Jaw.

    A very impressive but ultimately harmless piece of shark jawbone washes up on the beach of beautiful Amity Island, where it is later taken to the city hall to be displayed under glass. The summer tourist season continues on with little to no issue.

  • dual_sport_dork 🐧🗡️@lemmy.world
    37·
    1 year ago

    Gremlin (1984)

    A 160 minute slog of an arthouse film presented in black and white with almost no dialogue, chronicling not much happening over the period of several days to the owner of a chronically cantankerous compact car, which he can’t get to start and thus can’t go anywhere. Unrated; for some inexplicable reason, also subtitled entirely in French.

  • Alexstarfire@lemmy.world
    261·
    1 year ago

    The Incredible - Instead of his whole family being super, it’s just him. He’s hidden his identity his whole life and is killed by Syndrome trying to reclaim his glory days because there’s no one to come help him.

    Dead Poet Society - Just the sad story about the one guy who kills himself

    One Samurai - Weeb who thinks he’s a Samurai tries to defend the innocent. Gets killed on his first attempt.

    The Magnificent One (so many thing this could turn the movie into but I choose to believe it’ll end up about some religious figure)

    Ghostbuster - Just Bill Murray being a quack scientist the whole time, or maybe Egon having a fruitless search for ghosts

    One (previously Seven) - A documentary about some billionaire who thinks they’re special and the only one who can save the world.

    Star War - Stops after the first movie. Wait, this may make it better.

    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle - It’s just the scientist on his quest to make the first turtle

    The Musketeer - Given this movie exists and I doubt many people who watched it could even tell you what it was about, speaks for itself

    Transformer - Documentary about the making of the first electrical transformer.

    Tremor - becomes a movie about an earthquake that happens in Perfection. Destroys the few buildings in town and they are forced to rebuild or move.

    X-man - Story of the last person in the X-men group, basically a rehash of Logan.

    The Warrior - Yet another story about some special person in the distant past who’s a great fighter or saves his village from some bandits.

  • teichflamme@lemm.ee
    23·
    1 year ago

    Snake on a plane.

    It’s just one snake and Samuel L. Jackson stomps it to death in 2 min. The end.

  • ashok36@lemmy.world
    12·
    1 year ago

    A League of Her Own.

    Just 90 minutes of Geena Davis playing baseball by herself. Tom Hanks bullies her the whole time.

  • Moobythegoldensock@lemm.eeEnglish
    11·
    1 year ago
    • A Fistful of Dollar
    • One Amigo
    • One Idiot
    • Gone in One Second
    • 1 Going on 1 (13 Going on 30)
    • 1 First Date
    • 1 League Under The Sea
    • 1: A Space Odyssey
    • 1 Maniac
    • The Bird
    • Fat Tony@lemmy.world
      2·
      1 year ago

      A Fistful of Dollar

      The Man with no Name is not in this movie because one dollar was not worth his time.