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not_IO@lemmy.blahaj.zone to Political Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 months ago

epic win

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epic win

not_IO@lemmy.blahaj.zone to Political Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 months ago
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  • Janx@piefed.social
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    3 months ago

    While the victims reported more than $100 million in losses, Brink’s said the stolen items were worth less than $10 million.

    When life gives you lemons theft, commit insurance fraud! I say fuck the rich “victims”…

    https://apnews.com/article/brinks-jewelry-heist-ice-deportation-687c0197eda0ee6c8bfd1fb7f5987f35

    • theparadox@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      I think it was said the fraud is actually in the other direction. Jewelry is regularly undervalued to reduce the cost of insuring it.

      Brandy Swanson, the director of the San Mateo jewelry show, previously said the jewelers robbed of their gems had lost more than $100 million in the theft. Vendors claimed the figure was as high as $150 million.

      Swanson noted it was her experience that jewelry owners tend to underestimate their pricey inventory when it comes to insurance, to keep costs low.

      “That’s where the discrepancy comes in,” she said.

      https://nypost.com/2022/08/13/brinks-doubts-gems-were-150m-in-jewel-heist-lawsuit/

      Regardless, I think jewelry and precious gems are a racket. Also, fuck the rich.

      • MartianSands@sh.itjust.works
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        3 months ago

        I don’t think that’s fraud. If you insure an object for $100, then you get $100 if it pays out. That the object was actually worth a trillion dollars is neither here nor there

        • theparadox@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          Not really fraud when it comes to insurance which is what my wording most implied. Good point.

          I was thinking that it might be considered fraud when amounts were reported to Brink but I admit I know nothing about transportation/security type things. If Brink is just insuring it and the security is just to protect what is insured maybe it doesn’t matter. I know I’d be pissed if I was told I’d been transporting a much higher value target than I was paid to transport, and on a regular basis. $150 million is way more dangerous to transport than $8 mil.

          • MartianSands@sh.itjust.works
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            3 months ago

            Certainly, there are a bunch of other people who might legitimately need to know what they’re dealing with

            • Null User Object@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              In addition to all of the above thread, there’s also two ways to “value” jewelry. A) How much you could get someone to pay you for the item if you sold it, and B) How much it would cost to replace it with something identical or equivalent. Usually B is waaaaaay more expensive than A, unless it’s common Walmart jewelry counter grade stuff. And even then, B is merely waaay more expensive than A.

              • Instigate@aussie.zone
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                3 months ago

                There’s also C) How much the individual components of the jewellery are worth if disassembled/smelted down - i.e. the spot price of any gems or metals used in the piece of jewellery’s construction. This is usually the lowest form of valuation as it doesn’t take into account the labour/expertise of construction and has an associated smelting cost to extract the raw components.

      • DagwoodIII@piefed.social
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        3 months ago

        All ‘value’ is bunk.

        Back in the day, there was a place where you could trade a pound of salt for a pound of gold.

        Both were worthless where they were found.

      • Fredselfish@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Jewelry is not under valued, what fuck you smoking? My best friend run a Jewelry wholesaler business that shit is mark up 1000% especially diamonds.

        • theparadox@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          Personally, I think “pretty” things kept artificially scarce and heavily marketed to the point that there is a social obligation to purchase them for certain occasions are worthless. I have no idea why you are trying to pick a fight about this stupid shit.

          Under capitalism, the economic system in which this “heist” took place, things are worth what you can sell them for. That’s the capitalist definition of value. If you mark them up 1000% and people will still buy them then you can say they are worth 1000%.

  • Headofthebored @lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Dude was probably on the plane back to Ecuador just repeating “There’s no fucking way they’re this damn stupid is there?” to himself the whole time.

    • Catoblepas@piefed.blahaj.zone
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      3 months ago

      Everyone else getting deported probably wondering why tf this one guy is in such a good mood

      • nodiratime@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

      • Headofthebored @lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        😂

  • nicky7@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 months ago

    I'm actually supposed to be getting out of prison today sir.

    • Victor@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Dude I watched this for the first time two days ago, this is so crazy to be seeing this image suddenly.

      • DylanMc6 [any, any]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        3 months ago

        We need a Not Sure and Rita (and probably Frito) to help fight this Idiocracy

        • Victor@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          For sher dude, uhhh, wat yoo sed

          • DylanMc6 [any, any]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            3 months ago

            This might be unrelated - that said, I’m actually non-binary, and I prefer gender-neutral and feminine terms. Seriously!

            • zbyte64@awful.systems
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              3 months ago

              There are only two genders; binary and non-binary.

              • DylanMc6 [any, any]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                3 months ago

                Trans people and non-binary people ALWAYS exist. Seriously!

                • Victor@lemmy.world
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                  3 months ago

                  I think they were making a joke. Two — binary… 👍

            • Victor@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              Oh alright, then I used the right term.

              But more accurately, the “dude” wasn’t necessarily for you, more like a lone that could’ve been taken from the movie.

              👍

      • lohky@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Why come you didn’t watch sooner? Probably too busy baitin’.

        • Victor@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          😆 you crowbarred that reference in there lol, nice!

  • danc4498@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Is there details to this? This is hilarious.

    • EisFrei@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/jan/22/ice-jewelry-heist-suspect-self-deport

  • HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 months ago

    To a non-extradite country too lol

  • Zephorah@discuss.online
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    3 months ago

    The regime of chaos.

  • affenlehrer@feddit.org
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    3 months ago

    He could’ve just paid Trump for a pardon

    • iamthetot@piefed.ca
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      3 months ago

      Why? This was much cheaper.

      • jj4211@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        In fact, I think they offer to pay people that self deport…

      • affenlehrer@feddit.org
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        3 months ago

        He probably has to bribe himself out of an El Salvador prison or wherever they decide to deport him to

  • ThePantser@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    Well they said they would deport criminals, broken clock. Think of the savings they just made by not having a lengthy trial.

    • Janx@piefed.social
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      Reporting the stolen jewelry and gemstones at 10x the value lost is fraud. Are the “victims” going to be deported too?

  • FreddiesLantern@leminal.space
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    3 months ago

    Oh Hollywood, do something with this please 🙏

    • ameancow@lemmy.worldBanned from community
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      deleted by creator

      • FreddiesLantern@leminal.space
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        3 months ago

        Nah that’s a fair point.

        Ok, rephrase, talented people known as amateurs do something with this. 🙏

  • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    US even does corruption like it’s doing the police academy movie style.

    • Basic Glitch@sh.itjust.works
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      3 months ago

      When you hear about an epic fuckup like this by the U.S. government, it’s almost always an intentional mistake that benefits the people who actually got a bafoon elected to do as he’s instructed and cover for their “happy accidents.”

  • naught101@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Assuming this is satire? With an account name like that…

    • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      It’s being reported by a lot of major outlets:

      https://apnews.com/article/brinks-jewelry-heist-ice-deportation-687c0197eda0ee6c8bfd1fb7f5987f35

      • naught101@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Ah, thanks for the source!

        The US is in serious need of some reconfiguration

    • ickplant@lemmy.world
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      Nope, it’s true, they deported him to his childhood country of Ecuador that has no extradition treaty with the U.S.

    • EisFrei@lemmy.world
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      https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/jan/22/ice-jewelry-heist-suspect-self-deport

      • naught101@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Thanks for the source!

  • then_three_more@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Satire is dead

  • Uriel238 [all pronouns]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 months ago

    I robbed a bank full of dinero
    A great big mountain of dough
    So it was goodbye companero
    And cheerio
    I couldn’t stay and face the music
    So many reasons why
    I won’t be sending postcards
    From Paraguay, from Paraguay, from Paraguay

    –Mark Knopfler

  • OldChicoAle@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Jewel heist? Is this a GTA mission?

  • Lasherz@lemmy.worldM
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    3 months ago

    “Get his ass back here, we’ve gotta extort him for a pardon first.”

    • nodiratime@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      If he pays up, he even gets a seat on the board of… pieces.

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