How about an adolescent kangaroo?

  • cooopsspace
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    1 year ago

    A kangaroo would fking shred you. And while you’re trying to hold your intestines in it’ll then beat the snot out.

    • Delphia@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      As an Australian who legitimately had to do workplace training on how to deal with aggressive kangaroos (including what happens if you have to defend yourself from one) they arent that scary.

      To really go nuts with their legs they have to stop, plant their tail and use it for stability to rear back and kick you and they really dont like being hit in the head and face. So if you keep backing up and moving laterally they arent that dangerous. They are also dumber than sacks of wet shit. In a fight for my life I’d confidently say I could take one, but I doubt Id be in a good state.

        • Delphia@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Not willingly, but I think I COULD win.

          Id be less scared of a kangaroo than something like a Deer with antlers or anything with claws. Roos have weak arms, my plan would be to somehow get it in a choke hold and wrap my legs around its upper body, squeeze as hard as I can and start praying.