Hail Satan!

On my mama

Keep up the good work! I’m proud of you!

I finally found a job that doesn’t make me completely miserable and pays fairly well, and it only took me until I was 34.

Wrong on both counts, friendo.

You will never find a more wretched hive.

Smoke em if ya got em, kiddo.

Honestly, I have no idea how tennis works.

Give me like 30 solid years to practice and I’m confident that I could narrowly snatch one point away from an elderly Serena Williams.

Below knee.

This country is a fucking joke.

The word “panacea” is so cool.

Who better to answer this question than TheFeatureCreature?

Who the fuck would vote in favor of more shit in the water supply?

I second this motion.

Not as sick as you’re about to be from rat lung worm.

A lovely sentiment, but unfortunately it has no basis in point of fact reality.

Goddamn, I hope it doesn’t get worse that it is right now.

I’m arguably even more unhappy at home.