Do you like sex, Mr. Riker?

Corporate journalism has catastrophically failed.

Everyone to the escape pods. Good luck.

Face like a teenager, hands like an ancient monster

“It can be two things”

Dude, tomorrow’s already 41732.6

The alternate universe we deserve.

Ah the markets hare! Always in a hurry!

Yes. Upton Sinclair reference. My man!

That’ll be $276.43, and your card is automatically charged.

Thank you, Come again!

No returns.

On Wednesday, Hegseth was seen trying to sit down with a pair of bespectacled cybersecurity officials as a last resort, but they immediately moved their laptops and turned their backs to him. He stood up from their table only to bump into a tall, muscular four-star Army general and spill whiskey all over himself, at which point the entire Pentagon cafeteria burst out in raucous laughter.

“Aw, no, no, no!” said Hegseth, who looked down, noticed the Dewar’s dripping down the front of his pants, and hastily attempted to cover it with his hands. “I swear I didn’t piss myself. I just spilled whiskey on my suit. See?”

“Everyone stop laughing,” the defense secretary screamed before running off in tears to hide in the Pentagon bathroom. “Stop it!”

At press time, a concerned Pentagon custodian had reportedly discovered Hegseth fast asleep on the restroom floor.

Aw yeah. That’s the stuff.

I approve this message.

But seriously that keyboard’s gonna need to mech it up a little bit.

rofl

Oh yay.

So 10% of their yearly net profit. Not bad. We can do better though.

Delete it.

Sometimes I think the AI bubble is about people who don’t understand computers being put in a kind of purgatory where they have to work out why everything is wrong and bad.

Y’know, every day I get closer to seriously recommending people go back to paper and pen.

Everyone who works with trump get shit on. No exceptions.

Wooo!

Sorry bro! Sorry!

Scenery: repainted ikea furniture

vulcan / doctor / kirk: check

All extraterrestrial planets are shot in the back lot: check

Well, everything seems to be acceptable here.

May I see them?