So I was in my car and venting about how I hate Americans because of the vast amount of shit and hate and discrimination I’ve had to deal with on top of people here not believing in mental health problems so I’m expected to perk up magically even tho I’ve experienced threats of violence and dehumanization. People where I live are so hateful that if I said that last sentence out loud they would get angry because they don’t care what happens to people like me.

So even at home I have to stay as quiet as possible because there is no privacy here from the neighbors or “family.” My car is the only place I can vent. On the way to work I said I hate Americans and somehow my boss knew because after that he kept making comments about how he and I are just dumb Americans, something he never said before and he normally doesn’t talk like that.

Then he tried to guilt me because he’s black and his ancestors didn’t choose to come here.

Anyone of any background can go thru shit and no one can say otherwise and if they do then they’re just wrong. Nothing will change that reality and there are no excuses for treating people like shit.

  • ZenGrammy@lemmy.worldMEnglish
    3·
    1 year ago

    I’m sorry you’re feeling like you can’t express your pain with your family and your only safe place now feels violated and unsafe. I have said the same thing because I disagree with the way a lot of my fellow Americans treat people who are different in any way and I’m ashamed. You should be allowed to vent such things in some sort of private space. You’ve come to the right place to put those thoughts down on the computer screen and let strangers empathize and vent with you.

    I hope you’re able to get real help in the form of therapy and/or medication, or even just someone in your life who is willing to stand up with you and for you, really soon. In the meantime, you can come here and talk with us whenever you need to. It also may help to start writing in a journal, so you can say anything you need to say and either keep it or get rid of it as you see fit. Once it’s on the paper, a lot of the stress you felt is removed from your body.