• RyanGosling [none/use name]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    9 months ago

    How is that abuse lol. That’s just incompatibility. If she’s beating him or coercing him like holding his visa unless he converts to being a patriot, that’s abuse. But if you tell someone “I can’t be with you if you don’t agree on these fundamental truths” (whether it’s wrong or not), that’s just basic relationship management.

    • wild_dog [they/them]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      24
      ·
      9 months ago

      it’s abuse because there are clear racial undertones to her treatment of her husband. calling your husband brainwashed bc he doesn’t agree with what you think about the country he’s actually from is really weird. like who is this lady? she’s demanding “academic sources” that aren’t from China but i doubt she’s sourcing her claims from anywhere that fits those standards.

    • Greenleaf [he/him]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      23
      ·
      9 months ago

      The idea is that her belief in the fake genocide isn’t sincere, but it’s more like a “test”, if you love me you will agree with whatever I say or believe. That’s emotional abuse.

      • Tankiedesantski [he/him]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        12
        ·
        9 months ago

        “Test” is a really good way of putting it. Just the whole vibe she’s giving out isn’t one of trying to figure out her husband’s perspective, it’s a my way or the highway style ultimatum.

    • Tankiedesantski [he/him]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      14
      ·
      9 months ago

      The Cardassians weren’t torturing Picard when they tried to get him to say that there were three lights instead of four, they were just doing basic relationship management.

      Joking aside, I think it’s really fucking important whether or not the “fundamental truths” are true or not. “I’m divorcing you if you keep saying the Earth is round” and “I’m divorcing you if you keep saying that the Earth is flat” are not equivalent statements.

      Plus, the Redditor is approaching this from the angle that her husband is brainwashed and never stops to consider that they might be wrong about something, especially a topic where their husband might have greater familiarity. They’re being unreasonable and threatening divorce unless husband acquiesces. In my book that’s emotional abuse.