‘Better than a real man’: young Chinese women turn to AI boyfriends::Twenty-five-year-old Chinese office worker Tufei says her boyfriend has everything she could ask for in a romantic partner: he’s kind, empathetic, and sometimes they talk for hours.
TBF we haven’t set the bar particularly high.
Speak for yourself, I’m an absolute treasure.
old, buried underground and forgotten?
Hey, that’s hysterical, I’m gonna use that on my boyfriend real soon
If all you want is attention and you’re not willing to reciprocate, then yeah, maybe computer is your best hope.
If an AI friend is “better” than a normal friend, it looks like something in the social environment is seriously broken.
I mean, it will be. The AI friend is always available, always knows what to say, never fights with you, and never messes up (ideally).
However, all those things are part of the human element: and at the end, you’re still talking to a computer. The AIs are just trying to please you. A person can actually love you, and that’s something else. And I’d take that over the perfect chatbot any day.
The AI friend is always available, always knows what to say, never fights with you, and never messes up (ideally).
And isn’t that what people really want in a relationship? A perfect, frictionless yes-person trained to parrot whatever you wanted to hear six weeks ago.
The AIs are just trying to please you.
Its a bit worse than that. Monetized social media is designed to provoke engagement. So the AI isn’t trying to please you, its trying to maximize your utilization. That means establishing a clingy, desperate, attention seeking (ie, toxic) relationship that keeps you looking at your phone for as long as possible.
Its pleasurable in the same way a heroin addiction is pleasurable.
our brains didn’t evolve to need total compliance and total agreement from relating, tho. it’s more a sign of problems with society and too much isolation.
people love to abuse each other, and those who wish to live peaceful life become more distanced from social environment, my grandma said back in the day that “in her times there were no abuse and crime” i was like, yeah right, there wasn’t internet back then where people could refugee to, so everyone has only one choice, and that’s to be silent and endure
If men did this they would be labeled pathetic…
You’re 100% correct lol. Men who do this are roundly mocked and called sad creepy incels.
That said, the culture and dating scene for women in China is pretty awful. My ex was Chinese and had some awful dating stories, now she avoids dating Chinese men. Easy for her to do as she left china, but not everybody can/wants to.
We need to learn to be a little less mean to anybody who uses these apps. They’re likely doing it because they see little alternative, yet still want affection. Calling them losers, be they male or female, achieves nothing other than hurting them.
Only thing it does is makes mean people feel better about themselves by punching down.
Men do this and a company straight up profited from it until they tried to go back to be sponsor friendly and gimped their AI personas service
Ashley Madison?
Aren’t we already with this? I never see anyone going “You go queen!” over someone’s virtual bf
This is relatively novel, give it time…
I did see that response to “sologamy” articles - women marrying themselves.
We do and it is.
From what I understand there is a shortage of women in China compared to men due to the one child policy and most parents wanting sons so that makes a bad problem even worse.
if she’s happy, I don’t see the issue. She’s not hurting anybody and seems to have a good grasp of the situation. She’s aware it’s not real, and still participates.
The issue is that society is so atomizing and broken people are turning to chatbots for affection
it varies from person to person. she seems to be aware it’s not real. she’s not lying to herself. she’s just enjoying it.
Would you say the same for young men using AI girlfriend apps?
These are actually two parts of the same positive feedback loop.
Young men satisfy (in emotional sense) themselves with chatbots, lose ability to communicate with young women, thus young women see fewer young men they can communicate with, turn to chatbots, thus young men see fewer young women able to communicate and so on.
I would even say that this in some sense started with young women, not because I’m an incel or something, just drowning themselves in all kinds of romantic fan fiction etc is something girls apparently do more. And even romantic chatbots are not necessarily more accessible\understandable for young men, - despite all the social legacy girls can be quite tech-savvy when they want to find, say, some anime series. My sister unironically could understand some Chinese text because it was easier to find something on some Chinese sites (I’m not mixing up China and Japan here and the series were Japanese), she’d also have plenty of scary Chinese-style Chinese-language software installed under her user.
Why did I type this last paragraph, I wonder.
Owch… as someone trying to escape that cycle, I know at least the courser details, the finer details are new to me.
of course I would. why wouldn’t I?
Everyone wants the fiction. Nobody wants someone else’s problems.
Sounds like what they actually want in a man is a therapist.
A savvy young man might take note that “listening” is a desired trait in boyfriends.
I hope you don’t think it’s sarcasm, because it’s true for many lonely people. They need a therapist first. Yep, one they can feel something romantic for, that seemingly happens very often, just have to know some boundaries which don’t exist in an equal two-sided normal relationship.
What’s interesting is that the first chatbot software ever invented was used as a form of therapy. All it did was detect key words in the previous sentence and say “tell me more about how X makes you feel”
It’s like Joi from Blade Runner 2049.
Joi could phase into a hooker so you could fuck her. We’re not there… yet
we are, if you’re rich enough, or so i’ve read…
Talk for hours with an Ai? No thanks, sounds like torture… Unless you count problem solving with code discussions…
That’s just a friend, then. I would think a boyfriend would be a friend you could be physically affectionate to, which obviously you can’t with a chatbot. I’m not against people having virtual friends, I just don’t see why it’s a boyfriend.
What about long distance relationships?
“Long distance is the wrong distance!”
-Liz Lemon, relationship expert
same. it’s just clickbait adjacent wording to catch eyeballs for fun and profit.
or one woman, anyway.
Better than being “leftover”. Now they are virtually married.
It’s not too bad if the guy can actually make money driving Uber or something.
Yes I am real man want to go skateboards?
Gentlemen, we have been summoned.
