I (19F for simplicity) have a crush on this one girl (17F) I used to date about 2 years ago, let’s call her “Emma”. Now, I’m certain she doesn’t have feelings for me back while we still talk sometimes even though she flirts with me sometimes, and I don’t even know if she likes girls. Anyway, it’s just a little crush, and I’m in an open relationship so the girlfriend (F18) I have knows about it. I probably won’t plan to do anything as Emma isn’t even ready for a relationship until she graduates high school, that’s why we broke up.
This one girl I also used to date and tried to befriend before I found out she was using me, Audrey (F19) also said I was a bad person for being an adult and liking someone who is still under 18.
She then said it was weird because I was an adult and she wasn’t even out of high school, but she also told people that I was “attracted to a high schooler” and making it sound like the girl I liked was a freshman who was only like 15 or something.
So, AITAH for my slight crush on a girl I used to date because she’s not even out of high school?
This is just a point towards showing how damn stupid people have gotten over the moral panic around there being some arbitrary cutoff age.
You’re both kids, and you’re kids so close in age that you used to date. You turning 18 didn’t change a damn thing. You’re still age peers. May or may not match : maturity, development, or whatever, but that’s a separate issue.
NTA. In Australia 16 & 17 year olds are allowed to date someone within two years, so a 17 yo and 19 yo is legal. Ethically I’d also consider you both effectively in the same age bracket. My gf is 3.5 years older than me which is irrelevant in our 40s.
Young crushes can be hard. You might be being TA to yourself holding a flame for someone not interested, I did at your age. So if it’s not reciprocal consider some space to allow your heart to settle.
Thanks. IDK if she likes me or not, she usually crushes on men nowadays, that’s why I don’t know if she still likes girls or not. Darn this stupid crush LOL… She flirts with me, but she’s quite close with all her friends and we used to DATE for crying out loud. So, yeah, I dunno, but I know that even if she does have feelings for me she won’t say yes if I ask her out because she’s waiting until college/graduation. So I’m gonna try again closer to when I turn 20 if she’s ready to date or just let the feelings die once and for all.
Not really AITA advice, but rip the bandaid off now and tell her. Get it over and done with from your side. Holding a flame for this person for another ~year will cost you opportunity. I never had any luck with the women I crushed on until I’d moved on and they could see that I wasn’t obsessed, or they got jelly that I was no longer chasing them, mostly they just weren’t interested and it was good that I’d moved on.
Thank you :) I will definitely tell her. First, I will ask if she even likes girls
she makes it sound like your crush is like 15 or 16… wtf?? no, you are nta for having a simple crush and you’re NOT a pedo or anything like that.
You are both kids. You are fine.
Falls above the half your age plus 7 rule for checking if dating is creepy, and you’re not even dating.
