Motorcycles are cool. Electric motorcycles are even cooler, especially if you’re a filthy ecosocialist like me. Unfortunately, like any new and developing technology, they are plagued with security vulnerabilities purely due to the fact that they’re too new to have been subject to as much malicious scrutiny as older technologies. Around the end of 2025 and the beginning of 2026, Mitchell Marasch and I performed a security assessment of the Zero Motorcycles Android app, which quickly ballooned into an assessment of their PCB potting strategies and bike firmware. And fam, the results were bad. We were able to bypass authentication, sign arbitrary firmware, and even pseudocoded out The Malware That Kills You Instantly. But that’s getting ahead of ourselves.