Basically for most of my adult life I’ve struggled to have a life that I truly wanted. Not comparing myself to anyone else, but going from job that let me go to job that let me go. Not making ends meet. I never felt “normal.” I always felt like an anomaly.
Then the pandemic hit; while everyone else was panicking and not sure what to do for me it was–at worst–a mild inconvenience; and at the time I was working a retail job (at last feeling like I wasn’t going to get fired at the drop of a hat, which was a weird feeling). I was tech freelancing on the side, too, which is where my skill set was.
Then suddenly freelancing took off (I think it was because of the freelancing sites I was on “rotated” me to the top). I was able to quit my job, do freelancing full time. I was able to go on actual dates (since I want to get married). I moved out of my parents place. It was awesome. For once I felt “normal.” Again, while everyone was panicking I felt like I was finally going in the direction I had planned, with ease.
Then when everything was going back to “normal,” I started to lose the success that I had gained. The clients that I worked for during the pandemic didn’t seem interested in continuing working. I’ve since had to fight every day to get back to what my normal was (which was everyone else’s unusual season).
Anyone else feel this? Pre and post pandemic was chaotic, and the pandemic for me felt like I was finally getting somewhere in life. I realize a lot of folks died because of COVID (and many more families split because of it), but it just angers me whenever people talk about the “new normal” when there wasn’t a “normal” for me to begin with.
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My life was generally improved by the lockdown - i switched to grocery pickup (started spending less on impulse buys and eating healthier since i was preplanning everything the night before instead of just wandering the aisles), i really refined my home entertainment stuff to be perfect, I started to really ask myself “Do i need to do this or am i just following a script?” for social events, and found most of them were just mindless.
Yeah, I think introverts definitely got the better end of the deal with the social isolation. People kind of “forgot” how to do small talk, meaning real conversation happened. 😆
The pandemic dramatically improved my life. My income doubled, I got a way better career job at a workplace with permanent work from home. I finished a certificate I was working on. No one in my family or friend group got seriously ill with it or died. It was a tragic time but I’m finally living the life I always wished I was - I totally get it. I can’t really talk to anyone about it. I’m terrified work from home will get clawed back. My wife took an in office job and I hardly ever see her anymore with her work hours.
What shits me off the most about the push to return to the office by so many employers is that there’s zero logic to it. I wish they’d just come out and say “we just want to be able to monitor and micromanage you at all times, also we need to justify this building lease we’ve signed.” Fuck the HR script, just be honest about how little you care about your employees’ happiness and preferences, even when WFH arrangements have been proven to only provide benefits to both parties (the issue is nuanced, I get that, but for the most part, work from home is very popular because workers largely prefer it.)
I’m being overly-dramatic here, but seeing one of the very few upsides to the pandemic being thrown away for no reason legitimately pisses me off. I’ve worked for myself for years now (as someone on the spectrum, I’m just incompatible with the illogical rules and weird workplace politics a lot of people either don’t have a problem with, or are able to more effectively tolerate, as my varied job history will tell anyone), but if work from home was the normalized approach, I’d have likely been able to hold a normal job. I have seen a majority of my friends return to the office, despite things working really goddamn well for both them and their workplaces during WFH. None are particularly happy about it, but also none of them seem to care enough to raise the issue.
I feel the same, I get so annoyed when companies, governments, and anyone else uses dumbass excuses to avoid saying things directly.
I’d probably get even more frustrated if they openly said they don’t give a fuck, but not by much
I feel the same way! Although the beginning of the pandemic was rough.
I get swooped up in my emotions pretty easily, and so the first month or so i was in a serious state of panic. I stopped reading the news daily after that, which helped a lot in stabilizing. And then i realized that my social anxiety issues were getting the space i needed - quite literally. Social distancing made grocery shopping much more doable for me, people didn’t want to meet up, and large crowds … just weren’t a thing. I miss that a lot.
Mine was more towards the end. When my previous employer started talking about people coming back to the office, I started job hunting.
I found a fully remote role that paid an extra 30%. Within a year of working for them, they have me a promotion that was another 25% on top.
In the middle of all that I met my now-fiancée.
So just in the last two years, everything has gotten better.
To me it sounds like this is more about your job then the pandemic
Only partly, I think. I didn’t feel the panic that everyone else was feeling. I just felt calm and in control of my life for the first time in a while. I felt like I was finally “catching up” as it were (again not in a comparison mindset).
I wish it had lasted. But I know I can’t dwell on the past. I just have to keep going. This week I have a couple of potential clients that seem promising (for the past 2 years the client inflow has been dead silent) which will be a breather.
I did not have your experience, but I can relate to the sense that the pandemic brought about some really nice changes for me and my family and, while I would certainly never wish another pandemic on society, I can’t look back at 2020-2021 and say I didn’t enjoy it. More time with the family, more time with neighborhood friends (regular socially distanced evening gatherings around 2-3 fire pits), more flexibility at work (COVID remote turned into full time remote, permanently), more time outdoors… anyway, I do feel guilty (maybe that’s not the right word) about it, and it’s not a sentiment I express often, but I truly like where my life is today vs 2019, and I wouldn’t be here now were it not for the pandemic.
Pandemic was great for me. I was able to get my Master’s degree online, which generally would have been looked down upon prior to the pandemic as not being a “real” degree or being as rigorous, but since everything was virtual, I was getting the exact same course material online as I was as the in person students. I quit my horrible job and I got a great remote job. The market was great at the time, so I managed to land a job where my company was headquartered in a very high cost of living area. They paid me the same salary as their other workers. Without the pandemic I never would have been considered. My husband’s job became remote as well. He and I have become way closer during the pandemic and have lots of time to spend with our kids and dogs. I will never go back to working in an office every again. I have severe social anxiety and my job is located in a state that would take me 2 days to drive to, so I am not expected to come to the office ever, except for once a year there’s a fun day where they go to do some kind of outdoor event. It’s really been so great. I also hate wearing business clothes (don’t even like putting on a bra), so I get to be comfortable. I see a lot of jobs offered are now hybrid or back to in person, and I refuse to respond to recruiters about any of those. I don’t care if they are trying to go back to the old normal. The old normal sucked. I still wear a face mask every where I go, and I haven’t had so much as a cold since early 2020. Three whole years without any sickness. And I just traveled out of town and sat in a plane full of people coughing all over. In “normal” times I would have just gotten sick right away and spent half my vacation fighting some weird bug I caught on the plane. In these times where I am super careful, wash my hands constantly and wear a mask when indoors, I don’t get sick at all. It’s amazing, I don’t know why we don’t keep doing it. Does everyone just like getting sick every flu season?
I could have written this post, right down to the social anxiety. I can’t imagine going back to my old “normal”.
Dude honestly pandemic time was great for me. Like I feel terrible for everyone who lost loved ones and got sick, but pandemic/lockdown time was absolutely the best time of my life.
I was getting paid 60% salary to teach one online lesson per week, learned a new language, started eating better, worked out, and made some friends I’m sure I’ll know for the rest of my life.
Weird but hey when life gives you opportunities, you take them, regardless of what is happening around you.
So the pandemic time was weird for me too but in a different way. I was fine, the entire time I was fine I never got sick, got paid plenty from the government stimulus while I was furloughed and once back to work I got a big raise, more responsibility etc. However I think it made me depressed and I didn’t know it.
I’m a high functioning person, see me on the street any time and I’ll tell you I’m fine, because I am fine compared to those less fortunate but mentally I might not be and I couldn’t tell you why. Looking back now I can see it, I gained a ton on weight, drank a LOT more than normal and wasn’t interested in what I normally was. Sometimes I’d just sit and listen to music and cry. Every day I’d watch the news, people died, bodies piled up, people yelled and screamed COVID wasn’t real, more bodies. I couldn’t do anything outside and I’m generally fine with that (introvert) but… nothing outside ever, no events, not seeing friends or family, worrying every time I’d go to grocery store I might get sick, that did have an impact.
How can we make sense of pandemic times? Reflect I think. What did you like, what worked, what didn’t, more importantly, why? Then you can reverse engineer it and go after what you find works best for you. It’s a big crowded world we live in and we all have to find our place in it.
I think… I’ve learned I need to care for myself more and worry about other people less. I need to listen to my body and my mental state and I need to put more effort in where it matters most. Maybe that means completely changing my life, moving, switching careers, who knows? I do know my happiness can’t just be reactive, it takes work, a proactive approach
As someone who stopped drinking a few years ago, perfectly content to be at home with the family the overwhelming majority of free time, the quieter pace of pandemic life was good for my emotional health. My wife felt slightly more affected, but within reasonable levels, and the kids were fine. They might gave seen their mom frustrated, but never freaking out, and I was there to project a sense of calm. Plus living just a little outside of town, we have a nice yard with an above-ground pool.
I feel you. I quit my job at the end of January 2020 due to a health issues and… well, you know what came right after. Focused on getting my health right and then had a job lined up that fell through due to pandemic related terminations and suddenly I qualified for unemployment.
Got to relax for 6 months for the most part and destress, and in June 2020 got interviewed for a “dream job” at a company that was a long term goal for me. Hired on, started fully remote in August 2020 and have been doing the thing since.
Wife and I are already extreme introverts so this worked out swimmingly. Big pay bumps and bonuses, bought a fairly cheap home in the rurals and I’m living comfortably.
Pandemic times have been pretty good to me honestly, and wearing a mask to go out and stay safe is really no big deal.
