• IndiBrony@lemmy.worldEnglish
    7·
    10 months ago

    I know these feels. Some of us don’t get to lift ourselves up, though. It’s just a long list of letdowns.

  • XEAL@lemm.ee
    4·
    10 months ago

    Oh god, I need one of these about the absurdity of depression and suicide (been there too)

        • Bondrewd@lemmy.world
          1·
          10 months ago

          I kind of figured I can still socialize, and got suprised I really just fucking collapsed from the slightest challenge when it did not go my way. I found it absurd. Then I remembered all the fucking times I got disincentivized during all my formative years, the years of isolation because of my stomach issues… oops. Neuroplasticity actually did its thing and now I’m semi-locked in this terrible body.

          The counter-argument to the absurdity of depression is the huuuge fucking backlog and all the stuff you think can surely be ignored. Nop. The SECOND I ended my solitude living alone and moving back to my parents house I literally got better overnight.

          So no, I’m sorry, logic that depression is counterintuitive, so it does not make sense for you to improve upon yourself seems a tad bit shallow for me.

          Its more like a balloon. You can push in one place, it will bulge out everywhere else. Depressed state is the direction your body has the least pressure running to and all your decisions and events in your life pushed you there. If you change the incentives, you get a different result. Antidepressant modulated depression into some kind of neurotic manic state where I was extremely ramped up to do something, even if it is suicide.

          Then I could atleast work while feeling suicidal for months on end even though I went from not working to working at retail to sysadmin in a month. 1 year of stabilization later I’m so stable I finally went off.

          • XEAL@lemm.ee
            1·
            10 months ago

            You started a long discourse by assuming things I didn’t say. Specially this part pissed me off:

            So no, I’m sorry, logic that depression is counterintuitive, so it does not make sense for you to improve upon yourself seems a tad bit shallow for me.

            Depression is absurd, just like anxiety, allergies, cancer, wisdom teeth, asthma and more stuff (the appendix is useful, tho). We have to work with that because that’s how we evolved.

            I’m not denying the work and therapy required to getting out of depression, but we all would be better off if our brains could function healthily without being “depressible”.

            • Bondrewd@lemmy.world
              1·
              10 months ago

              So I respectfully nail what you think and you still get pissed. This is peak lemmy.

              Also, this is my only assumption, the rest is about my experience and thougts that lead to my conclusion. It is pretty fucking disrespectful of you to own it like you had something to do with that part. I wrote it out, deal with it.