I try everything I can, music, animation, art, programming, even Sports yet no one understands me!

It’s so hard to live with autism, and I’m wondering how I can get help. 😩

  • @SeeMinusMinus@lemmy.world
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    108 months ago

    Having autism can be quite difficult. We are all in this together. There are people like you going though the same things you just have to know where to look.

  • Ivy Raven
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    88 months ago

    Being understood is difficult. I find I’m very intense when it comes to something I’m into. And I talk in long sentences or type walls of text. Those can make it hard for people to respond or interact.

    Sometimes you just have to do you and do it with pride.

  • @0x4E4F
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    88 months ago

    What exactly do you mean by no one understanding you?

      • @0x4E4F
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        48 months ago

        You can’t expect people to understand if you don’t explain 🤷.

          • @0x4E4F
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            18 months ago

            Well, if you don’t try, we can’t help.

            I don’t have autism, but I am kinda weird, so I think I could (maybe) help, but you have to explain things.

              • @0x4E4F
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                8 months ago

                🤷

                You have to start talking man, otherwise we can’t help.

                EDIT: Sorry, just realized you’re a woman 😂.

  • tygerprints
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    78 months ago

    Huh? What are you trying to say? :/ Sorry I was deliberately being an azzhole. I feel the same way you do. But, I stopped caring a long time ago. I never did fit in with other people, and I was never anyone’s idea of what a human should be. So, fuck 'em and forget 'em. I’m loving the life I was given, I’m gifted and have traits that make me unique. And I love being who I am, and that’s all that really matters. And I kind of like the fact that I get under other people’s skin just by existing. It kind of gives me a greater purpose.

    • @0x4E4F
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      8 months ago

      Don’t have autism (at least, I don’t think so 😂), but yeah, I rarely fit into crowds as well. The funny thing is, people usually like me (I’m kinda the clown of the party, but that’s just who I am), but I rarely like them. I don’t avoid contact, at all, but if, let’s say, I exchange numbers with someone, chances are I won’t call you. I just feel like I don’t belong in that particular crowd… don’t know why, I just fell that.

  • 520
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    8 months ago

    If you want people to understand you, you have to communicate with them what you want them to understand. Explicitly. Don’t drop hints or clues, you have to say it outright. People are not mind readers, or even experts in non verbal communication, not even NTs.

    Hopefully the person you convey your feelings to is compassionate and empathetic. Be prepared for if they aren’t though. Don’t be afraid to just drop these kinds of people like a shit in the toilet. Just wipe, flush and walk away. They don’t deserve your time.

    • @Wes_Dev@lemmy.ml
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      28 months ago

      That’s good advice. I had to learn that the hard way.

      Just because something seems obvious or clear to me, doesn’t mean it does to others. It gets exhausting having to explain everything though. It’s also equally exhausting to ask others to explain what the hell they’re talking about constantly, because they also assume you can read their mind and have the exact same thoughts and reactions that they do.

      And then you run into the issue with family or coworkers completely ignoring the things you directly do or say, and throwing their own bizarre interpretations and assumed motivations on top of it, and getting upset when you react.

      I’ve had people do and say things that are insulting and combative out of the blue on first time I’ve interacted with them all day, demand I reply, and then get upset of me for starting a fight when I ask why they are being rude, or when I reply in kind.

      Maybe I just keep bad company, but it feels like being gaslit 24/7.

  • @Halasham@dormi.zone
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    48 months ago

    Yeah, it’s difficult sometimes. My friends sometimes don’t seem to get me sometimes but sharing common interest(s) seems to work. Playing games together even if not directly interacting (eg both of us on the same Minecraft server but me building a base and them exploring/mining or playing separate empires in a friendly game of Civilization or Stellaris)

  • jerry
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    48 months ago

    I seem to understand you just fine, what’s up?

  • I'm back on my BS 🤪M
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    38 months ago

    I feel like that too sometimes. It’s an overwhelming, lonely, and hopeless feeling that is nearly unbearable. I just end up isolating myself through those times. It can help in the moment so that I don’t react in a way that hurts others or my relationship with them, but if I stay isolated for too long, I get even more sad and lonely. It also doesn’t give me an opportunity to find people that may understand me, which makes sense at the time because I’m already convinced that no one will anyway. I’m sorry you’re going through that, but I’m happy you felt comfortable enough to share here.

    If you haven’t already, maybe consider joining our chat when you feel better. We have a room specifically for venting and seeking help from each other, along with other rooms for lighter topics. I hope to see you there 🙂

  • tygerprints
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    28 months ago

    I don’t think I have autism either, but I’m just different. I like most people, but most people do not like me and I have no idea why. I’m as nice as can be, and don’t have angry outbursts or unpleasant habits and I’m very friendly. I’m just not most people’s idea of what a guy should be, though i don’t know why. I’m not effeminate or anything, and if I were, I don’t see anything wrong with that anyway. I just don’t fit into their ideal picture of what a person should be for some reason. But, I do have good friends who are loyal and I do have plenty of fun just doing what I do - so it’s all OK.

  • @DudeDudenson@lemmings.world
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    28 months ago

    I don’t think expecting people to understand you is the right mind set. You have to understand them first, why they’re unable to see what you want them to see and guide them to understanding.

    Easier said than done but my point is that we shouldn’t blame others for our own inadequacies

  • @Retro_Unlimited
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    18 months ago

    I find in life that some people get me and some people don’t. I try to surround myself with people that do understand me. I know I’m different, but everyone is different. Just have to find the right kind of different. :-)

  • AbigblueworldOP
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    08 months ago

    I can’t read all of them but I can tell you’re being very helpful :D

      • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        There is not much believe necessary. Only that there could be help because someone told them that there is. If they tried everything else, what is the harm in trying it with Jesus?

        • nyoooom
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          8 months ago

          Jesus was born around 2000 years ago and the oldest person ever recorded lived a bit less than 123 years, so either he’s dead, either he’s hiding very well, and thus can’t do shit either without getting exposed.

          Checkmate idiot.

          But you might wanna try to get help with Santa tho, and don’t tell me he doesn’t exist, there are many more recorded encounters with Santa than with Jesus.

          • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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            -18 months ago

            That is a straw-man argument because no one is claiming Jesus lives in the way you are describing it. Also you didn’t even look into the link because your “argument” is not addressing any of the arguments in there.

            • nyoooom
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              28 months ago

              I honestly don’t really care, you are free to live your religion the way you want, but I don’t think it’s okay to bring that forward on a post about autism and mental health. How would you feel if someone else posted that “Allah can help them”? Your comment just feels pushy about your religion without providing any other useful input to OP’s problem.

                • nyoooom
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                  18 months ago

                  Whether or not I have advice for them is not part of the debate.

                  That video is just anecdotal evidence, there is also plenty of evidence of religions creating a lot of suffering, particularly mental health issues related to education due to beliefs (for example for LGBTQIA+ community, which has a lot of overlap with the neurodivergent community).

            • @xophos@discuss.tchncs.de
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              18 months ago

              All “arguments” in your text are just stories. Not a single fact in sight. But the word fact is repeated ad nauseam. As if it is trying to summon facts from thin air by invoking the word often enough.

        • @xophos@discuss.tchncs.de
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          18 months ago

          What is the harm in trying it with the flying spaghetti monster? That’s one of the most funny arguments. As if the alternative to atheism is belief in your god. Like there aren’t a million other ones to choose from. No thank you. If I ever cast my lot with a god, (which is very doubtful) I’ll choose one that at least has a sense of humor.

        • @biddy@feddit.nl
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          8 months ago

          Your argument is called Pascal’s wager. My main objection is there’s a lot of superstitions to try. If you want maximize the benefit of a strategy like you’re describing, you have to worship every god of every religion, obey every limitation on what you can do in every religion, superstition or conspiracy, take every supposedly magical medicine, ect. They all seem equally unlikely, but they are all believed by someone and if true would have huge benefits, so by your logic I should follow all of them completely. Except by doing that I am sacrificing most of my life for the tiny possibility of a benefit, rather than making the most of the life I know I have.

          • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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            -28 months ago

            That was only an argument why you could try it not an argument for the validity. For that you have to look at the link in my other comment.

            • @xophos@discuss.tchncs.de
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              18 months ago

              Don’t forget that most religions have edicts that contradict those of other religions or even forbid you to practice other religions. So to maximize your utility function you would need to exclude those. I seem to remember that yours is among those.

              • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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                08 months ago

                You forget that that there is another possibility: that one of the religions is true. Of course I am thinking that my religion is true just like you think that your belive is true. I have way more reason to believe that my believe is true than the minimal fact theory. The fact that you just dismissed all the facts in it as mere stories shows me that there is no sense in giving you the other reasons. Have a nice life.

        • torpak
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          68 months ago

          Nope, the burden of evidence is on the one claiming something contradicting current scientific understanding.

          • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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            8 months ago

            I provided evidence. Why are you asking me to provide evidence if you are not willing to look at it?

            • @biddy@feddit.nl
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              68 months ago

              I looked at it. It’s a bunch of anecdotal evidence from 2000 years ago. Anecdotal evidence is well established to be extremely unreliable, people hallucinate all sorts of nonsense all the time. I couldn’t find a justification for how any amount of anecdotal evidence can prove resurrection, which violates many scientifically proven theories.

                • @biddy@feddit.nl
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                  38 months ago

                  What part? There’s nothing revealing about calling it anecdotal, all historical evidence for that time is.

                  I just don’t think the anecdotal evidence is relevant to this discussion. The claims of Christianity are so great that it doesn’t cut it for me.

              • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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                8 months ago

                And another one who didn’t really look at it yet feels compelled to reveal their ignorance by making unqualified comments.

    • @SeeMinusMinus@lemmy.world
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      38 months ago

      Just remember everyone. This is a place of peace for believers in god and atheists alike. Arguments over this kind of stuff should stay out of this community.

      • @vaseltarp@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        I’m an atheist

        My condolences. You will never find someone who understands you like God, your creator, understands you.